My friend Leah is working on a portrait series to honor the late and great Ruth Bader Ginsburg and part of that was a short interview where she asked me about how RBG’s legacy has impacted me. She started by asking me to describe her in three words, and one of the words I settled on was ‘demanding.’

I think a lot of times if you hear the word demanding, it comes with a negative connotation. But while talking to Leah and thinking more and more about it, I’ve realized that demanding isn’t bad. Demanding is fighting for what you believe in. Demanding is fighting for what you deserve. Girls and women can stand to be more demanding in our everyday lives. A lot of what I write about and talk about on here is about relationships and dealing with men in a dating aspect, and I think there is no reason why you can’t be demanding in a relationship. Demand respect, demand what you want and need, because the right person will give you all of those things.

I’m so sick and tired of being the person who doesn’t say what I really want to for the sake of not stirring the pot. But if there’s one thing I’ve learned this year is that I can be demanding and I can be a bitch and not actually be a bitch. Telling someone off when they’re not being good to you is not a bad thing. Telling men that you want to be respected is not a bad thing. Telling white people that black people need respect and rights is not a bad thing. None of these things are bad. I’m a living breathing person who deserves respect and to get what I need.

At the end of the day, the only person I owe anything to is myself. I’m not apologizing for being me anymore. I’m not apologizing for doing what makes me happy and trying to get things that I want and need in life. Men get to be selfish all the god damn time, but women don’t. Fuck thattttt. I’m going to be selfish and demanding and a big ole fucking BITCH. Don’t fuck with me anymore, because I’m done being a doormat.

Unsure what got me so riled up right now, but Grammarly told me my writing sounds angry. Sounds about right!

If you live in the Boston/NH/Southern Maine area and are interested in being apart of Leah’s series, you can email her at leahslens_@outlook.com! Follow Leah’s Lens on Facebook and Instagram.

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