In my forever quest to find the perfect Bumble line, and a few weeks ago I did attempt to use “can I Uno reverse card this whole messaging first thing?” and it absolutely flopped. But last night, fueled by a bottle of prosecco and way too much discounted Valentine’s day candy, I decided to try again. And there were some successes, some total and absolute flops, but some successes.
Okay, this man makes a good point. If you’re unaware, Bumble is the app in which the woman have to message first, men can’t message the women first at all. I like it because I can aimlessly swipe to see who matches with me without the fear of them saying anything weird, this guy likes it because he doesn’t have to come up with an opening line. 8/10 response, because I mean, I did in fact Uno reverse card that shit, and we love someone who is self aware.
Um. Are you joking? This guy’s bio said “funniest guy I know” so I knew it was over before it even began, but I didn’t think it would go so south so quickly. Who uses that emoji? It irks me. It makes me so insanely uncomfortable, I have no words for it. And no, I don’t have to do jack shit… My message was a fucking joke, does that not interest you?? 0/10. For obvious reasons.
We love this. Because yeah, what rule is there that says I can’t! We love this. What a great start. Just allow me to do me and everything will turn out (mostly) fine! I don’t think this went any further, but whatever, you win some you lose some. 8/10.
Um. But I literally just did? The whole point of it is to start a conversation without necessarily starting a conversation, and I quite literally did that considering he responded to me. So either he’s stupid, or annoying, or trying to be funny. And none of those are fun for me. Well, stupid I can deal with. But the other two, not so much. 3/10.
Again, let me do what I want and we will (probably) have a successful situation on our hands. Also, unsure why, but I love being called cutie or cute. Probably because I am stinking adorable, but it’s just so pure and wholesome. And if I had to pick a petname to hear from a stranger, it would probably be cutie. Though, if someone called me cutie in real life I would probably debate throwing a drink in their face, but that all depends I guess. 7/10.
Happy to know that I am the person that is able to get away with this, so that makes me feel great. Pretty funny response too, though I don’t think Uno Reverse cards have exceptions, they have to be excepted at all times. 7/10.
The lack of punctuation in this gives me the heebie jeebies, but other than that it’s a great message. Does this man not know what a comma is? I use about a million commas when I’m texting or writing, which, you guys probably have picked up on. But, he called me cute, which we have established is something I enjoy, so 6/10.
I saved my favorite for last. I think this is funny, because messaging first is in fact a burden. Also, sliding in with a compliment will quite always win me over. He’s referencing my first picture which is from NYE 2020 (RIP) in Nashville, and my outfit was in fact fire. I typically hate responding to any variation of how are you, but something about him made me want to answer, so I did, and so far so good. So 10/10 opening line, I’m quite happy with it.
Stay tuned to for more experiments with Bumble opening lines, as we try to find the absolute best one to use to get what we want.