I’m (basically) Tik Tok Famous

Step aside folks, I'm famous. I'm fucking Tik Tok royalty and I'm proud to be here (kind of). I've been secretly posting on Tik Tok for a few months now, slowly gaining followers, watching my views and likes go up and up. And not telling anyone I know because I was so god damn embarrassed. …

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Kidz Bop Covered Truth Hurts by Lizzo and the Lyric Changes Are Both Amazing and Atrocious

We all know I'm a Lizzo stan, but did you know your girl used to be a Kidz Bop stan?? This was mostly because my parents are wildly overprotective and didn't want us listening to swears. Me, my siblings, and my cousins would perform music videos and Kidz Bop, Now That's What I Call Music, …

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@KFCBarstool got in a Twitter Fight with the entire country of Serbia and it’s hilarious.

Alright, saddle up fuckers. KFC, if you're reading this, what's up. To everyone else, hey. Everyone knows I want to work at Barstool, and today on radio, Kevin made, what I think might have been a joke, saying if someone compiled the best tweets from his war with Serbia, he would consider them for an …

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Not Your Momma’s Advice for Your Freshman Year of College

Please quote tweet this with your best advice for someone starting their freshman year of college on Monday. — Stacey J. Spiehler (@StaceyJSpiehler) August 18, 2019 This tweet popped off on Twitter and I'm almost five years out on my freshman year of college, but you know what, I got some god damn ADVICE. And …

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Things That Keep Me Up At Night: Superman’s Sex Life

Do you ever have those nights where your mind just won't turn off? Sometimes it's about something you wish you had said, sometimes about an embarrassing moment in middle school, sometimes it's about Superman's sex life. The other night I could not sleep. And all I could think about was whether or not Clark Kent …

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There are people that exist in the world that buy used toilets from Delta Airlines

I was at work scrolling through LinkedIn and came across this Business Insider article and I honestly could not have been more annoyed. First, of fucking all, anyone who refers to a bathroom as a lavatory needs to be put in jail. Fucking weirdo. Second, of fucking all, I know for a fact that there …

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