If you were a cool girl who read in middle school, you most certainly read the Clique books. I was such Clique fan that my AIM screen name was ADMItsSarah because Alicia used to say ADM instead of OMG - for ay dios mio. And if you were a Clique fan you know where I'm …
Continue reading The Current State of the Union: Chaotic Girl Summer
I mean, I'm the queen of judging boys dating profiles. It's truly, truly one of my all time favorite activities. I've shit on so many profiles on here before, including Hinge Bingo, but more recently I've been really thinking about what things make me automatically swipe left on a profile. The things that I see …
In my forever quest to find the perfect Bumble line, and a few weeks ago I did attempt to use "can I Uno reverse card this whole messaging first thing?" and it absolutely flopped. But last night, fueled by a bottle of prosecco and way too much discounted Valentine's day candy, I decided to try …
Continue reading The Best And Worst Responses to My Uno Reverse Card Bumble Opening Line
Those stupid fucking strip LED lights that everyone and their mother has on Tik Tok have zero place in an adult mans bedroom. If you are over the age of 18 and don't live in a fucking dorm room, please, for the love of fucking god, lose the damn strip lights. I do think these …
We all know I'm a loyal(?) user of dating apps. Mostly to shit on men, mostly for content, partly in the off chance I meet my soulmate. But the other day while perusing through my profile on Hinge I realized that you could set certain preferences in terms of the profiles you saw. For those …
I simply cannot help but laugh at my ridiculous love life at this point. I mean, I'm simply one meet cute away from a stellar plot to a romantic comedy. Okay, maybe just a sub par Netflix romantic comedy, but a romantic comedy none the less. I truly cannot help but laugh. Without context this …
I've been on the hunt for the perfect Bumble first response for what feels like forever. And unfortunately, I am not any closer to finding us a solution. I hate having to message first, but I also hate the shit that some guys come up with on other dating apps, so Bumble is just this …
Continue reading Apparently you cannot Uno Reverse sending the first message on Bumble
In typical Sarah fashion, this isn't an advice blog, this is a cry for help. I feel like I'm always getting this question on dating apps, and I never know how to answer. I mean first off, I don't have a single fucking clue what I want. Some days I want to fall in love …
I was scrolling through Bumble, trying to find a blog to write, and I came across a very sexy man, so I swiped right. We matched, WAHOO! But then, I went and clicked his profile to find something to message him about and he is the owner of the worst fucking Bumble bio ever that …
Continue reading Remember That Worst Bumble Bio Ever?? He’s 29 years old.
We've all seen some pretty rough dating app bios, but nothing has given me such an viceral reaction as "Can I be you little *spoon emoji* *smirk face*" I actually wanted to puke just typing that... Nothing wrong with men being little spoons, but there is something so cringey about Fucking typing it like that. …
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