What's up party people? I have here one of the cringiest, funniest, most absurd first date story in the history of first date stories. When Lifetime or Netflix inevitably makes a Covid RomCom, this story will be a part of the plot. I went on a Bumble date the other day. He was so incredibly …
Biracial Booty is putting on their lab coats and science goggles in the first ever Biracial Booty Science Lab Experiment, name pending. I was scrolling through Tik Tok the other day and saw one of those #WhiteBoys that's covered in black line drawn traditional tattoos. Like these kind of tattoos. The kind that you get …
Continue reading Would You Date a Man (or Woman) With Their Birth Year Tattooed On Them?
Those stupid fucking strip LED lights that everyone and their mother has on Tik Tok have zero place in an adult mans bedroom. If you are over the age of 18 and don't live in a fucking dorm room, please, for the love of fucking god, lose the damn strip lights. I do think these …
If you clicked this blog because you thought I would be giving you some sort of sound advice on getting a guy to text you back, you'd be wrong. I'm not entirely sure what about me made you think that I could give any sort of dating advice, this isn't a blog you come to …
Since I’ve worked in the recruiting industry for the past three years, I’ve learned a lot about people. People are idiots. No matter what type of education they have, or how much money they make, boiled down to it, people are dumb. In the past three years, I’ve seen a lot of dumb things. I …
Continue reading How to Attract a Man That Will Love and Cherish You
We're back, back, back, back again. It's Episode 3 of Readers Choice of Celibate and the Suburbs. This one is actually from an actual couple!! I know! It's shocking! I never talk about actual couples on my blog, they seem so elusive! Boys are so dumb, they would never be in a relationship. But not …
It's episode 2 of Reader's Choice over here at Celibate and The Suburbs. If you haven't you can go read that here. Today, I give you, The OG Ghost. The OG Ghost If you didn't notice, this screenshot is from the year 2013. Before ghosting was even a term, my friend was ghosting this guy …
It is literally no shock to the readers of my blog that I think boys are the stupidest creatures on the planet. It blows my mind that they're allowed to have as much power as they do? Who decided this? I blame Adam. I know I've been sharing my shitty dating experiences, I use the …
One of my favorite TV shows is Sex and The City, I want to live my best life as the best combination of Samantha, Carrie, Charlotte, and Miranda. Unfortunately, my love life is nonexistent, so I give you: Celibate in the Suburbs. I don't live in the city, and my love life is in the …
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