“Girls don’t actually like dad bods” is actually a lie told to you by Big Gym. I love dad bods. The chubbier the better. GIVE ME CUTE CHUBBY BOYS WITH A GREAT SENSE OF HUMOR OR GIVE ME DEATH. Because I'm a basic ass white girl, a lot of people tend to assume that I …
Step aside folks, I'm famous. I'm fucking Tik Tok royalty and I'm proud to be here (kind of). I've been secretly posting on Tik Tok for a few months now, slowly gaining followers, watching my views and likes go up and up. And not telling anyone I know because I was so god damn embarrassed. …
A huge part of being single and 23 are the dating apps. If you read any of my blogs you know that I'm on fucking all of them - let's pretend it's all for content purposes. If I happen to fall in love after the fact, it's all a plus. I don't typically use Tinder, …
We all know I'm a Lizzo stan, but did you know your girl used to be a Kidz Bop stan?? This was mostly because my parents are wildly overprotective and didn't want us listening to swears. Me, my siblings, and my cousins would perform music videos and Kidz Bop, Now That's What I Call Music, …
Wow, another sad post from Sarah about how she's single. Barf. Just so you're aware, I'm just as annoyed with me as you are. But the evil content machine that is internet stardom demands blogs, so here's a god damn blog about the only thing I'm an expert on: being sad and alone. In the …
Continue reading Celibate and The Suburbs: No New (boy)Friends
Alright, saddle up fuckers. KFC, if you're reading this, what's up. To everyone else, hey. Everyone knows I want to work at Barstool, and today on radio, Kevin made, what I think might have been a joke, saying if someone compiled the best tweets from his war with Serbia, he would consider them for an …
A few weeks ago I decided that I wanted a t-shirt with my Biracial Booty logo on it. The "not a porn site" tagline is just so funny to me, and I knew it would be killer on t-shirt. Now I've made some more merch and you can buy any of these as a shirt, …
